The Conspiracy Unfolds...

There have been some startling developments in the recent weeks in the Great Chili Forbearance of 08-09. Hornets season ticket holder, trusted legal counsel, certified Commander of Head and friend of the NO CHILI, NO PEACE!!!! Blog has discovered a significant revelation in a previous visit to a Hornets game in the New Orleans Arena:

- there is chili available -

The chili in question is even listed on the Hornets’ web site. I would turn your attention under the listing for WOW Café & Wingery (located in Sections 109, 211, 311). Does this mean we will see an end to the boycott of concessions in the Arena?

Most definitely not.

Firstly, you will notice that the availability chili is restricted to fries. Considering the onus of our mission is to reinstitute the fan favorite chili dog, we are obligated to continue the fight. Secondly, Chili fries are not an accompaniment to ‘erge drink, even with a touch of the exotic queso (or as we in America call it: “cheese” - pronounced ch z). Thirdly, as our trusted legal counsel will confirm, chili cannot AND WILL NOT be segregated from any and all medium of consumption. The thinking of condiments as "separate but equal" is simply archaic and we will not stand for such a repugnant initiative as instituting Jim Crochili Laws in our fine sporting venues. The right of equal access to all condiments has been determined as inalienable since the days of Brown Mustard vs. Board of Condimentation (1954) and the Chili Rights Act of 1964.

But it isn’t just the violation of basic Americana that the dark concession overlords are partaking. There is subtle evidence that brainwashing and detailed distraction tactics are taking place. However, the NCNP!!!! Blog has used all of its well-established fact-finding assets and abilities (including, but not limited to, embellishment and pure conjecture) to pry out the truth of the far-reaching conspiracy.

Fact:
A source (that will remain anonymous for her own protection) engaged in a conversation with an individual intimately involved with concessions at both the Arena and Superdome. The focus of which was on the lack of chili and the questioning as to the motivation for the embargo. Our source received an interesting response in that conversation. The response to the line of questioning, “They don’t have chili? Since when?” This response coupled with the placid, seemingly zombie-like response from those behind the counter can only mean that the word “chili” or any synonymous reference triggers a Manchurian Candidate-esque state brought on by severe brainwashing.

Startling Fact:
The Hornets’ organization itself is a party to The Great Chili Forbearance of 08-09 by engaging in a propaganda campaign focusing on distraction. The article below was featured in the initial issue of Hornets Magazine, which is available to season ticket holders, evidences this campaign. The commentary of one Brittany Cranston spins quite a yarn of the gastrometric virtues that the Arena has to offer. An aside: when you Google “Brittany Cranston”, of the many items you may find, one of them is not that her name is an anagram of toasty non rib trac. Which is obvious proof that she is one that is against slow cooked, meat based products, making her a perfect vehicle for the proliferation of the misinformation being put out by Big Condiment.

But friends, the focus of your attention should not be on the words that are being spewed. Your attention should be alerted on the vector shown below:
If it is not obvious, let’s take a closer look:
That’s right! I give you evidence of a false claim.

SEE!!! They themselves are admitting that chili is appropriate to the service of hot dogs. Let me diagram this for all that doubt:
If you follow the green vectors you will note that the concession overlords admit that hot dogs directly accompany chili of their own volition.

The orange vector is the NCNP!!!! Blog's contribution showing direct correlation between hot dog and chili.

THAT’S RIGHT...CHILI:
YES! CHILI!
But you may think, ”Well, now that I see it up close, I can’t be sure. That could say anything”.
I submit this. We ran the photo through the NO CHILI, NO PEACE!!!! forensic imaging processor:
That’s right, it says chili. It actually encourages the marriage of chili and hot dog:
This outright affront to condimentarians everywhere will not stand. We cannot rest in the background while the concession overlords act all smooth like they are Omar Epps or Chris Gains or something.
Keep up the fight. Act now. Continue the boycott and smother the oppressors as chili smothers the dog.